Moving in

I like moving in at least a day before everyone else because I can then spend the day seeing all the people moving in. I am not a nostalgic person, but I find seeing everyone again comforting somehow. Of course, there are people I don't really know and people I wish I did not have to see, yet there are so many people that I love to say "hi" to. I doubt I will get to hang out with most of them unfortunately. This is okay though. I have done this for two years now. I am happy to just know that these people are doing alright. That they made it through the summer and are back here in this place with me is comforting.

Maybe it is because I like to think of my life in terms of a TV show. Every end of summer is the start of a new season. I as the main character have wacky adventures and dramas every so often, but just like The Simpsons' Halloween episodes and Friends' Thanksgiving shows I have some specific episodes that are always the same event, but with a new perspective. These perspectives compound with reflection. And now I share this year's with you...

Freshman year was new and exciting. I was busy setting up a living room in Bardon with Nathan and meeting people who understood my taste in somewhat obscure song quotes. I was in love with everything college could be for me. As the week went on I felt like I had found a home in which I would be able to prove that I am a big deal.

Sophomore year was still very new. I had recently fallen for a cute redhead I had befriended freshman year, and knew I was going to meet so many more new people. Unfortunately, I lost many friends in at least the ability to hang out with them due to a few social faux pases on my part and theirs. As the week went on I saw that my year was going to full of choices to shape the rest of college.

Junior year had me declared. I never wanted to declare, but they made me. I was also in a position to meet lots of people because I would be living with them, unlike the last year. I was ready to do just that, but school tends to keep that from happening. I was ready to show those freshmen that one day they could be like me.

Now... I'm a PA, still with my wonderful redhead, and about to start the thing that has always signaled the end of college to me: my thesis. I keep saying that I might stay another year, but that is out of fear. I don't know what's next. I don't know how this can be my last move-in to my happy Honors home. As itchy as my feet are, I don't relish the idea of not being back here. I should be more worried about finding a grad school, or at least a place to be after college. I should be ready. I should want to move on. I don't want to though. I just want to know that I will have this episode again and hope that when it comes around again I will be ready for it to be my last.

God, it is my first day back and I am already thinking about next year!